Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad

Today would have been my parents’ 43^rd wedding anniversary. May 6^th always started the present-palooza for my mother.  She made it clear that she didn't want just one present for her anniversary, birthday and mother’s day.  No.  She demanded a separate present for each occasion.

I never really saw my parents as a romantic couple.  Mostly because, eww. Gross.  They’re my parents.  That and they weren't overly mushy. They did spend a lot of time together and had shared interests like flea markets, garage sales and auctions.  They enjoyed going antiquing for fishing paraphernalia.

My mother never left my father’s side when he was dying. They didn’t need to be overly affectionate for me to know that they were in love. She had no intention of remarrying after he passed away.  He was the one man for her. He said he liked her because she wasn’t like any other woman he had ever met.  She was truly a one of a kind.

Sick

I'm sick. 

The sickest I have been since I was in rehab in 2011 and a terrible bug was making its way through the Manor. I am not pukng my guts out, but my head feels like it's going to explode due to the congestion. I also have a double ear infection. I caught Sandra's illness that had her out for most of last week. I missed two days of work. Then went back for a day. Today I was there for 30 minutes before I couldn't take the ear pain anymore and made an immediate care appointment at the place just off campus. After picking up the drugs at the pharmacy I went home to put a hot water bottle on my right ear to try and soothe the pain. It worked well enough for me to be able to sleep for a few hours. 

I always want my mommy when I'm sick and the past 11 years have been so hard without my mommy. 

The first time I went to the hospital for a MS relapse, I just wanted her with me. I was scared because they didn't have any answers right away. Although a stroke was in the table as a possible diagnosis, I had a feeling it wasn't that. I had seen the symptoms before. Numbness. Weakness. Dizziness. Fatigue. My mother battled those on a daily basis. I knew it was MS. I could handle that because I watched my strong, amazing mother handle it. I wouldn't say she handled it with grace. That wasn't the type of person she was. She handled it with strength and humor. 

Most people would want their mommy to hold them and snuggle them. My mommy would have done that if I were say, five years old. I'm a grown woman though. She probably would have told me to suck it up and quit whining. Then she'd take me to get a hot fudge cake and diet coke. 

Unless this was like the last time I remember her taking care of me when I was sick. I was home from college for winter break. I had lunch with my mommy at one of our go to spots, the Cooker by the Dayton Mall. I had a salad with ranch dressing. Rancid ranch dressing. The genius that I am, I kept tasting it to see if it was in fact rancid. It most definitely was. (I don't know why we went there so much. We were always sending good back for some reason or another. Maybe that's why they closed down.)

Thanks to food poisoning, stuff was coming out of...wells, I spare you the details. 

Just like when I was a kid, I got to stay in my parents' bedroom because it was closest to the bathroom and easier for my mom to keep an eye on me. She brought me water to keep me hydrated and tried to get me to eat even though it was the last thing I wanted to do. It didn't matter that I was 20 years old. My mommy took care of me. 

Mama Memories – Diet Coke and Hot Fudge Cakes

Since the Corvallis, OR MS Walk is on what would have been my mother’s 67th birthday, I am going to celebrate her this year.

Leading up to the event I am going to do my best to share a memory of her.  I am craving a soda right now, so I am reminded of my mother and her love of Diet Coke.

She was a fan of the diet coke, as well as hot fudge cakes from Frisch’s Big Boy. She would often go through the drive through of the Frisch’s on old Route 4 in Middleton and order a Hot Fudge Cake with a Diet Coke. She knew the two didn’t really make sense served together, but she didn’t care. That’s what she wanted. There were several occasions where I would join her and get a HFC myself, but pass on the Diet Coke.  I would always give her my maraschino cherry since I wasn’t the biggest of fans.  (Sorry Oregon State.)

Having read an article about Aspartame and Multiple Sclerosis, she stopped drinking her Diet Coke. That theory that Aspartame causes MS has since been disproven.

The next time I am in Ohio, I will go to Frisch’s for a Hot Fudge Sundae and a Diet Coke. I’ll leave the maraschino cherry for my mom.

Hot Fudge Cake

Heredity and MS

"While MS is not hereditary, having a first-degree relative such as a parent or sibling with MS does significantly increase an individual's risk of developing the disease. Studies have shown that there is a higher prevalence of certain genes in populations with higher rates of MS. Common genetic factors have also been found in some families where there is more than one person with MS. Some researchers theorize that MS develops because a person is born with a genetic predisposition to react to some environmental agent that, upon exposure, triggers an immune-mediated response. Sophisticated new techniques for identifying genes are helping to answer questions about the role of genes in the development of MS."

I stole that straight from the National MS Society website: http://www.nationalmssociety.org/What-is-MS/What-Causes-MS

I have a vested interest in learning more about MS and its affects on my family Mainly I am concerned for the well being of my baby girl. 

She is more susceptible to having MS. The fact that her mother has MS and she's a female play into the probability that she herself will have the disease.  

Not cool. 

My mother didn't even know she had MS when she was pregnant with me. I don't blame her at all for the fact that I have MS. Even if she did know, I still wouldn't blame her. However, how could I live with myself knowing I indirectly caused my child any pain?

When I was pregnant, I prayed for a boy. If my offspring were male, he would have a lower risk of developing MS. 

The maternal line in my family is riddled with neurodegeneration. My Mamaw (maternal grandmother) was victim to Alzheimer's. My family is no stranger to the MRI. I'm really hoping it ends with me. Little Sandra has better things to do than worry about her brain. 

We need to move closer to the equator. There are lower numbers of MS patients the closer to the equator. If Sandra is genetically predisposed to MS, she still would need to be exposed to the environmental factor that causes MS. Studies on MS and vitamin d have caught my attention since my diagnosis and even more so after my last MS related hospitalization. My vitamin d levels were very low after I moved to Oregon. The first, grey and gloomy winter in the Willamette Valley had me weak, blind and saying, "Why o why o why o did I ever leave Ohio?"

I take vitamin d pills on a regular basis now and we give Sandra vitamin d as well. It will have to do until we can move to a sunnier part of the world. I would totally change my latitude if it meant helping my baby. 

Memory

I almost forgot to write a blog post as part of my MS awareness week blog a thin. I forget a lot of things. It's probably my least favorite symptom, along with frequent urination. 

I write notes. I follow routines. I create checklists. All of these help to some extent, but things get dropped. It's not that I don't pay attention detail. I just don't remember the details unless I write them down. 

It can be frustrating. 

Juggling work and motherhood has proven to be challenging. Throw in trying to get my MBA and an internship and I have more than a full plate. I do think that taking classes is helping. I exercise my body, but exercising my brain is helping immensely. 

I have noticed that I'll have really good days. It's almost as if a fog has lifted and I can focus. I use this time to get things checked off my to-do list. Then the fog comes back and I'm back to trying to remember where the heck I put my phone. 

Happy 67th Birthday Sandy

I have been participating in various MS Walks since I was first diagnosed in 2009.  I started in Ohio and continued when I moved to Oregon. They have all been really special, but the Corvallis, OR walk this year is on a very special date. 

Had my mother been alive today, she would have celebrated her 67^th birthday on May 9. That just so happens to be the date for the Corvallis (and Eugene) walk this year. So my team, the Nutria Fan Club, will be partying this year at the walk. There will be party hats, noisemakers and CAKE!  I’m sure to get some people to join us with the promise of cake.

I don’t remember exactly when she was diagnosed with MS, but I do remember it in the summer and I think I was 13 or so.  Although looking back on her medical history, her neurologist deduced that she must had been living with the disease for at least 20 years at that point. One particular event stood out in her mind after my brother Joe was born when she went blind for two weeks. At the time, her doctors thought she was stressed from having a new baby. She found that hard to believe since he was such a good baby.  (I find THAT hard to believe since I know my brother.)

Even with such a life-changing diagnosis, she had a good attitude about having MS and was quite self deprecating. Not being able to walk very straight due to her disability, she would say that if she put a flask in her back pocket, no one would ask questions. She even scared us a little bit with her sense of humor. When her friend and coworker with whom she carpooled would call her in the morning before work and ask my mother if she would want to drive. Even though she had vision problems, she would just point out that since it was dark outside in the early morning hours, she didn't really need to see anyway. Then when her feet would go numb, she’d call them her Spongebob feet. One of the last Christmas presents she gave me was a Spongebob Squarepants blanket. I still cuddle with it today when I feel like I need to feel her close.

Even when she learned she had cancer, she still had a positive outlook and a joke to share. Sadly, she lost the battle in September of 2004. I miss her every day and know she would have fallen in love with my daughter. (Who wouldn't?) I miss her the most when I’m having a bad day with fatigue or pain. Although there are ways to talk with others with MS thanks to the National MS Society, it just wouldn't be the same as having my mother to talk to about various symptoms and obstacles.

I want to celebrate her on her birthday this year. I want to thank her for teaching me how to be positive and be able to laugh at myself. It makes things a little easier. And because my mother would never let us combine the days or the presents, we will also celebrate the following day since it will be Mother’s Day. On that day I will reflect on the 23 wonderful years I had with her and rejoice in the fact that I have a Sandra (my daughter) in my life once again. 

All donations I receive for this year's MS Walk will be birthday presents to my mom.  If you would like to give my mom a present this year, go to my National MS Society Walk fundraising site. It is tax deductible.  When was the last time you gave a present that was tax deductible?

For anyone who donates $67, I will post a picture of my mommy on Facebook with a special thank you.

Are you  jealous of our mother/daughter perms?

Multiple Sclerosis Awareness Week March 2-8, 2015

It's Multiple Sclerosis  Awareness Week!

Actually the whole month is for MS awareness, but we're going to really focus on this week I guess.  March 27th is World MS day, so March is a busy month for those at the National MS Society. .  So be aware that I will share little snippets and facts about MS in general or my life with MS.  Since I never blog anymore, it's nice to have a reason outside of mommy duties.

I will write about a new topic everyday with lots of interesting facts and undoubtedly funny commentary. I will also be whoring myself out for donations to my walk and my bike ride.  That's right.  I am doing TWO fundraising events this year.  Call me an overachiever.  Or an idiot.

If you have any questions about MS, you might want to ask a doctor.  I can only really tell you my experience and send you links I found via my friend google. The National MS Society is also a better resource than I.

So Happy MS Awareness Week.  Or maybe, I'm sorry you have first hand knowledge of the disease because either you or a loved one has it, but we can commiserate together!